it is funny when i think how i used to put in so much effort for a relationship to work. and then i would find the other being complacent but now i think it is all my fault for being too nice to them. for spoon feeding them so much that they didn't realize they were being such bastards after all. for trying too hard in hoping they would return my love as much as i do. then i would try n try n try again. i never understand how one could give up easily bkoz that is not me. i don't know where this entry is going but it must be my thumping brains that got me typing.
and only now. now, at 22. i understand the meaning of......"the one". "the one" could just appear in your life when you least expected it and it's so fucking true. there i was, at rouge, after a couple of weeks of madness and crying foolishly and baking and swimming, there he stood. ok fine. so it was kind of not that accidental for him to notice me but what da heck, it worked. and who knew that exchanging sms in the wee of 0430hrs could lead to this? and now i understand that savage garden song so well. i used to think how could one knew that he already loved her before knowing her? skali, jeng jeng jenggg! it strikes to me. meeting "the one" is better than seeing strangers eating ur home made cookies with much love for ur home made cookies. the satisfaction is at its highest. it is better than the feeling of pride after swimming 15 laps. so much better that it doesn't tire and wear you out at all. and when he talks, he looks into your eyes. and when he's saying his apologies, you just don't know what to say bkoz he apologises at every silly accidental blurps he did. and you can't stand it when he's sick. and you can't stand it when he's tired. times like that, i wish i have my license so i could tell him to go to sleep and leave the driving to me. i'm so gonna get my license after i finish skool lor.
and so, thank you to all those i dated. those who broke my plastered heart. and those i broke theirs. and them who didn't mean to hurt me at all but situations were being merciless for not giving us a chance to be. i believe that if i didn't cross each one of their journeys, i would not have met my Farid sayang. and bkoz of these experiences in my relationship resume, i know every corner for hiding, every scents of lyings and every frames of loyalty. and bkoz of them too, i know what's best for me and what's best for the trash.
and he told me last night "the past 2 months have been the best 2 months in my life...ever. thank you for appearing in my life, Elya". TGIFU too. and he drove me home last night despite his nose trying to run away from him and his magic fever. love love love!
and so, my bf is sick. and so am i. no running nose. no cough cough. just the norm migraine and fever. i hate migraine attacks. like how much i hate sharks hunter. like how much i loathe animal abusers.
ok wanna go to the visit my doc now. hopefully i'll be lucky enuff to get a 2 days MC too like my bf. and then i'll have time to upload my weekend madness with the girls. weekend madness could only mean me being home after 7 in the morning. yeahhhh that kind of thing. crazy lar! but i miss them. and this kinda madness will only happens once to thrice a year. so don't worry. hahahaha.
